My window creaks and I know what is waiting for me out there.
I look outside and the bright, summertime soul has been replaced,
With a fiery, scorched vision of the long, bleak autumn I've had
And the cold of the coming winter for which I should stand braced.
But I've been away. I've been so away I missed September.
I missed it's songs and it's glory and it's sweet transformation.
I've missed October's long, slow days of torture and suffering
And it's conclusion in a great whirlwind of nightmare children.
I've even missed November's burning skies and needless ashes,
Returning as I did a day too late to marvel and stare.
My window creaks under pressure of the ever-spreading frost
And I look outside and my Autumn is dying in the air.
The once blooming willow trees have lost their lives in wandering winds,
Now skeletons of themselves reaching for grey and dreary skies,
Wavering sentinels ready to collapse under the strain
Their whispering branches bending and intoning woeful cries.
Icy rain falls suddenly and my wonder washes away,
Confusion at my apparent months long coma fading fast,
Replaced by cool madness at all I've lost because of your lies
And the lasting anger that you'd dare drag up my misty past.
This year, this Autumn, I did not mourn her hurtful, awesome loss.
You took this rightful pain from me and made me harsh and selfish,
Stealing her dedication and remembrance, all I have left
Of her beautiful soul in all those black, wasted days I wished.
Her life for mine, or one day for one hundred I'd sacrifice
Just to hear goodbye and get to say I love you one last time.
Or to get one last, not even lasting moment in her arms.
I don't get that, you harpy. All I have is one mourning night.
I draw my curtains and fall back from their awful orange print,
Crashing down to cry at last over something more worth my tears
And forget the agony sewed through my happy, little life,
Living for the dead and gone for all my still remaining years.
posted to http://oneshotpoetry.blogspot.com/